Faith in my Fellow American

I eat McDonald’s a minimum of once a day.  I’ve gone the distance a couple of times (3x).  I don’t exercise and I drink regularly.  I’m fortunate to have one hell of a fast metabolism.  Maybe one day guilt will overcome me.  Every once in a while I get on a “health kick” but it never lasts.  Never more than a week really.  I’m one of many 20 something men in America who share my mentality.  “Aren’t you worried about dying?”  “Your body is a temple.”  

I do worry about dying, and I know my body is a temple.  But I am a damn good accountant.  Follow me here fellas.  I went to school for it.  I know the numbers game.  I didn’t go to school to be a doctor.  I had to look up what a “tendon” was after a friend made reference to tendons in his hand hurting (Nate).  Why didn’t I ask at the time?  Gamesmanship, that’s why.  I can’t let him one up me with knowledge like that.  He does that enough already; no harm in me just playing along.  I knew it wouldn’t help his golf game, and I was happy about that.  I knew it made him feel uncomfortable, and I felt for him in that regard.  

A doctor knows what he’s doing.  I’m typing on a laptop now.  We can talk to anyone in the world, video chat, real time, because of this device.  Where do you think technology will be in 10, 20, 50 years?  I’m going to have a head transplant.  I don’t think I will ever die (from natural causes).  Heck, I don’t see myself getting hurt too bad from un-natural causes either.  Somehow, I always escape the good ol’ boy shenanigans with minimal injuries. 

I believe in the American way.  That’s not caring what I eat, having fun at the expense of my “long-term health”, and relying on the hard work of my fellow American’s to help me along the way.

Kevin

Cynicism Makes You Look Smart

The Powers That Be (PTB) would have you believe that everyone is entitled to their own opinion and that these individual opinions should be listened to and respected. In actuality, the preferences held by those around us work as nothing more than weaknesses waiting to be exploited.

Punching holes in the evaluations of an adversary is a quick and easy way to present yourself as intelligent and prevent any attempt at an effective rebuttal.

Cynicism, when applied appropriately, can act as an unlimited resource in the unlikely event that your opinion clashes with that of another. Presenting an idea or judgement as preferable can prove difficult in a world where nothing can be perfect. Pointing out the imperfections in this world is not only easier, but also elevates one's perceived standards. When a person seems to almost never be satisfied, he or she will be assumed to have the finest of tastes.

It is not enough, however, to merely look down your nose at the opinions of others. It is equally important to provide supporting observations. This is not complicated for the seasoned cynic.



Credulous Craig: The makizushi at The Sushi Palace I had the other night was delicious.



Sid the Cynic: Are you serious? That place uses low-grade seaweed wrap and I am pretty sure their chefs aren't required to have any professional training whatsoever.



Congratulations Sid. You now look like a sushi connoisseur, and have successfully made Craig look like he has no idea what he is talking about by using information that will almost definitely go uncontested at the time that it is divulged.

Bob